4.30.2012

Put a Ring on It.

So. I want to talk seriously about rings right now. Not just rings, material things. (I'm kind of on a soap box, here). It's a topic that I recently discovered on a wedding discussion board (I will not say on which website, and will keep everything quite anonymous). The poster was upset because they disliked the size of the ring they were proposed to with, and thought that their betrothed did not spend much money at all on it (the amount of money was disclosed and it happens to be, for most people, a significant amount of money). Ok, sure---one can feel that way, I won't judge. However, to go on and on about how detrimental it is to their relationship and how the OP feels that they didn't get what they "deserved" made me tick. It started me thinking about how unfortunate it is that some people can't help but correlate material wealth with depth of love. Per this particular example, the size of the diamond (0.5 carats), was less than the OP said that she deserved. Now, do I know this person or her FI? No. Do I know their relationship? No. But what I do know is that currently the poster of this article cannot focus on her engagement ring as a symbol offered to her by her FI of love, regardless of size and price. And for that reason, the post actually bothered me.

Not to mention that she posted that engagement rings that are $1,000 and 0.5 carats as less than...whatever, I'll let that go. It's her opinion. Bottom line is if it is that important to her, the OP would need to have a mature and sensitive conversation with her fiance. Not complaining over a topic discussion board hoping to get sympathy over a disliked engagement ring. Please, don't get me wrong: I have absolutely no problem understanding people who have a specific dream ring or a vision of what they want being unhappy with what their SO offered them, so long as they find a way of conversing with their significant other about it. Not going behind their FI's back and degrading the ring that maybe the FI put effort into, genuinely thought would be accepted with happiness and had sentimental value. Then I thought that maybe the OP felt that her SO didn't put enough time, love and thought into the purchase ring? Even if that is the case, a simple conversation between two people who are about to promise the rest of their lives together would suffice. Call me 'Old Fashioned' but this sort of disrespect toward some one's future spouse is completely uncalled-for.

Why should a stone set in a band worn on your finger measure the relationship it represents?

Best,

Micah

P.S. Sorry for the kind of rant-y post. It was something that I felt very strongly about. I mean no hard feelings toward the poster of that particular topic board, or to anyone at all who feels the same way as she does. I am deeply sorry if I have offended any one in any way by writing about this topic. If I have, it was not my intention and I sincerely mean it. Just one of those things that really "Grinds my Gears..."

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